Most of us desire change, as long as it is the change we want. Change that gets inflicted upon us isn’t usually that kind of change, and yet it is ultimately taking us to a better place if we surrender to it. Change is inevitable, whether we choose it or not. If we deny change, we will still have to face it. If we align ourselves with it, we can embrace and enjoy the process of change.
Many of us fear change, believing “it’s not safe to change” BUT staying the same will become unbearable. We are here to transform and to grow. If we don’t embrace change, pain and dissatisfaction will build up in our life until we reach a tipping point and are forced to surrender and change (otherwise known as a crisis). Whatever we resist, persists. The change you are trying to avoid won’t leave you alone!
Every challenge we encounter is pushing us to transform in some way – it could be we need to transform a belief, an attitude, a way of thinking or being. It could be that we are being pushed to move house, find a better job, find our purpose, leave a relationship that’s run its course or find a new hobby or passion.
Very often we won’t know what it is because we’re too “in it” to see, and this is where meditation can help because we gain more detachment and clarity.
The ego mind loves its comfort zone. It loves certainty and it loves the known, and if we’re not mindful of this, we can get stuck in the ever-repeating known. It may feel comfortable but it can also become dead-boring! And it actually doesn’t stay that comfortable!
Most of us like our routines – they give us a sense of safety and predictability. This is a very human thing – babies and children thrive on routine! And there is nothing wrong with routine, as long as we balance it with some risk – being willing to step out onto the edge sometimes.
The risks I’m talking about are the soul yearnings that we all have – the want to explore, to be creative, to feel joy and to express ourselves and perhaps find parts of ourselves that we haven’t yet found.
To a certain extent, most of us are living our lives like goldfish in bowls, unaware that there is an ocean to swim in. That ocean is the field of all possibilities. We don’t believe possible what we have not yet experienced. Meditation brings us into the field of all possibilities. If you begin a regular meditation practice, be ready to receive inspiring ideas and intuitive leads, and for divine synchronicity to enter your life.
Why do we fear change? Change can involve loss – and many of us fear loss, but there is no way that anything new can come into our lives unless we let go of the old. This is the Universal Flow. If we cling to the old, we create stagnant energy. When we learn to let go gracefully, we find that the Universe abhors a vacuum – it will always be replaced by something new and better for us.
Many of us fear what other people think but I love the saying “What other people think of you is none of your business”. You may be surprised just how much you are holding yourself back unconsciously through fear of what other people think. When you worry about what other people think of you, you lose a lot of energy. If you have a fear of judgment, you will attract judgment! And you’ll probably also be quite judgmental yourself. Let go of judgment and it will let go of you.
So we fear the consequences of change –we may experience loss, we could be judged, we may risk feeling out of our comfort zone or be the new kid on the block, but with any change we must ask ourselves “what is the worst that can happen?” This way we face our worst fears head on. If the answer to that question truly is unacceptable to you, then don’t make the change, HOWEVER also be mindful that our ego mind loves to catastrophise, and most of what we worry about rarely comes to pass.
In fact when we make change for our highest good, guided by our own intuition, we are ultimately rewarded. It may not be immediate, but the rewards will come.
If change freaks you out, take baby steps rather than big leaps. If there is something you want to change in your life, break it up into steps. Lao Tzu told us that the “journey of 1000 miles begins with one step”.
Change requires faith and trust that the Universe is on your side, even if it doesn’t feel like it sometimes! Sometimes we are pushed to change in profound ways and it feels uncomfortable and even scary, but ultimately we are being taken to a better place.
Change takes courage. Anais Nin told us “life shrinks or expands according to one’s courage”. Courage doesn’t mean we are fearless; it means we acknowledge our fear and move forward in spite of it. And an interesting thing happens when we face fear. When we look into the roaring lion’s mouth, all that we feared falls away. It takes courage to forge your own path, to make choices that are true to you and no one else, but this is the only true path to bliss.